Of Old Friends and New Tales

There is an old nursery rhyme or song that's come to mind lately.

It's rather short, kinda like Row Your Boat.

It goes~

Make new friends

but keep the old.

One is silver

and the other's gold. 

There are many quotes and sayings

advocating the importance of friends.

And I would venture to say, 

not one of them is an exaggeration.

We need friends no matter who we are or what our character.

I view myself as an introvert,

but I've been told by several employers in particular

how easily I speak with clients.

The thing is, I don't have problems talking.

(Just ask any of my grade school teachers:-)

It's the getting to know me bit that's a challenge

so my friends are real treasures to me.

There are those rare occurrences when you will meet someone,

and it's like you've known them all your life.

Those are the easiest and often the closest friendships.

There are also the friends that develop over time.

Those are nice in that there are typically few expectations

about what's ahead. 

They can become valuable in that each person knows

the habits and norms of the other person so they know well

just how to help or get along with the other person.

There are some "firey" friendships.

I'm not so sure those are real friendships.

And lastly,

there is a new kind of friendship.

Those found here online.

In a way, it's not really a new kind.

In years past, there were pen-pals that created friendships.

These friendships are a different kind of valuable

because there is no keeping up appearances.

There is no:

"I don't like going to the store with Jane because she wears too much perfume."

Or 

"She just walks so slow."

Or 

"I'm allergic to her cat."

Whatever.

Those things don't matter one iota if you aren't there with him/her.

(By the way, I actually like the name Jane and cats among other critters.

Too much perfume and slowly meandering through a grocery store

might get to me a little though.)

So what of these friends of different sorts?

What actually makes them important?

Well, you see~

humans are a herding animal.

I know there are some out there who don't take fondly to being called an animal

and others who take it as a compliment.

But we are creatures on this earth, and we were created with instincts.

Hubby and I were talking a while back, and he made the comment 

that he wasn't sure why but religious communities have lower crime rates.

The uncertainty was because people who are religious 

are just as likely to commit crimes from a statistics standpoint.

I said two words:

It's community.

He looked at me kinda sideways.

I continued~

Acceptance is what every person seeks deep down

 be it gang members or church members.

You follow the rules of what is acceptable in order to be accepted,

and you don't hurt your own.

If you break those rules, you are kicked out of the heard, gang, church,

community.

That's where those friends come into play.

Our friends accept us.

They still love us even if we snort when we laugh,

even if we spill down the front of our shirt every time,

even if we aren't super stars,

even if . . . well, you get it.

Our friends accept us for who we are.

There has been quite a bit of discord in 2020.

Communities have been shattered.

Families have been separated.

Friendships have been strained.

These things are more important now than ever.

I guess the point of this post is just don't forget.

I know different areas have different mandates in effect,

but there are still things you can do.

Leave a bag of tomatoes hanging on the door knob of a neighbor

then call and let them know it's there.

(If you don't have any to spare, just let me know.  I have tons!)

Send a quick note or card to a friend or family member.

By all means hug your kids and grand-kids!

The risk of them feeling abandoned, unloved, or neglected

far outweighs that of a virus.

I worry about the unintended consequences 

of some of the things that are happening around us.

There are ways to make new friends also.

There is always someone who could use a friend.

Ask a pastor if there is an elder who can't get out much.

A phone call or dare I say even an old-fashioned letter

can go a long ways in brightening someones day.

Or, a couple other ideas:

a nursing home director - sorta adopt a grandparent

a childcare provider or family member with munchkins 

(kids love a phone call to them rather than to Dad or Mom)

Obviously, that one would need parental approval.

Teens!  They need reassurance as much as any 2 year old.

The last thing they need is to hibernate in their room for a year.

There might be someone who has a family member in hospice.

They are typically exhausted and could use a nicety.

I really think most of you are pretty kind and creative.

If you have more ideas,

please share in the comments.

So all of this to say,

remember to remember 💝

 

By the way, I'm one of those folks who loves to do those little 

random act of kindness.

They often cost very little, but can be very meaningful.

Okay, I'll stop (see told ya I could talk.)

I just want to encourage folks to be friendly.

Have a beautiful day.

The Importance of Friends

Good Morning Everybody.

I hope each of you had a blessed and beautiful Easter day.

You may have noticed I've been away for a little bit.

My friend Shirley died last week.  She was 91 years old.  

She and her husband had been married just shy of 73 years.

He will be 95 next month.

I am writing this because their's has probably been 

the most important friendship of my life.

I have learned from them, laughed with them, and still love them.

We met when I was 20 and living across the street from them.

I complemented her on their yard.

We started talking and haven't shut up since:)

She has taught me so much over the years such as:

the names of plants and flowers (most of which I still can't remember.)

How to use mace (the spice) and where it comes from.

This is the other part of the nutmeg and is the flavor

of your grandmother's cake donuts - yum.

So much about refinishing furniture, it's mind boggling.

How to use rice to clean bottles.

And so much more.

And then there were the stories from her youth.

Her father died when she was 6 years old.

At 8 years old, they moved and she had to ride in the rumble seat with her dog

and an umbrella from Michigan to Florida.

Her mother sold half of their house in Michigan.

They were somehow able to remove 1/2 the house.

Then they just had to add on a kitchen because that was in the 

half that was sold.

In Florida, she fished off the dock as often as she could.

One time, their house keeper used the water from boiling 

hotdogs to make her tea, then proceedings and laughter that followed.

When they were first married, she had a hot plate in the closet.

She would take to clothes out to cook.

It was just a one room "apartment,"

and they shared the bathroom with 3 other couples.

They lived in Seattle while he was in the service.

She had an hour bus ride at each end of the day 

to get to and from work.

She called their camper - the cramper.

And there are many more of these stories too.

But one of the most cherished lessons

I've learned from her is not to use names.

She would say, "Some friends in such-n-such town..."

I had met them, knew who they were, but she 

didn't say names - no gossiping.

I loved that about her.

The day I first realized that, we talked about it.

From that day forward, I too try not to mention names.

I'm not sure what it will be like with her gone.

But one thing I will certainly aspire to 

is to be the same kind of friend she has been to me.
She (they) have shown kindness always,
counsel when requested,
a shoulder to cry on at times,
as well as smiles, laughter, and all the little conversations
that make someone a friend.

I will miss her terribly
but know she is still 'with me'
and is keeping God good company.

Things are beginning to settle down a bit
(though I am hesitant to say that)
so I should be able to get back to the blog.


Until next time,
Nimble Fingers and Even Stitches

*~*~* Grandmother Apple*~*~*

It might seem strange to some folks

to have respect for a tree.

It's not that it was planned.

It just happened over the years.

This is the tree under which my children played.

They gathered worms & bouquets of violets.

They entertained friends and

learned to climb.

She watched as my son fell from her branches.

At 4 years old, I heard the cry/holler then nothing.

Talk about a heart attack.

My motto was always, "If they're crying, at least you know they're breathing."

I raced over to find him, breath knocked out, but fine.

Children don't climb trees any more.

Go ahead and ask how many have next time you see a group of youngins.

Yes, learned to climb.

There used to be a second trunk/limb.

You can see at the base where it was.

Last winter, the wind broke her.

We considered cutting the whole thing down,

but I couldn't bring myself to part with her completely.

We cut the broken side off and waited to see what happened

not knowing if it was just a matter of time, and

we would have been wiser to take care of it all at once.

She limped along through last summer.

She bore no fruit.

She survived through our odd winter.

And this spring she showed us her beauty once more.

She has more to give.

It just took us believing in her.

This seems like such a good parallel for our lives.

Sometimes, we are broken by "things" life deals us.

We still have life in us...still have value.

There is someone I know who will be 94 this Saturday.

He and his wife have possibly been the most valuable friends

I have ever been blessed with.

Many of their friends have already passed.

They are likely looked over by many among the current generations.

They still have something to give.

I seek and value their knowledge and insight with every life decision I make.

I might have a different perspective,

but I consider and respect their input.

Like Grandmother Apple,

they have something left to give.

I can hardly wait to see what autumn brings.

Until next time,

Nimble Fingers and Even Stitches

Diamonds in the Dust

*First, I would just like to say that I think my computer is being abducted by aliens.  We will see what happens when I try to make a post.

I hope everybody had a fantastic weekend.  I was lucky enough to get some stitching time in.  I love the folklore of having a spider in a crazy quilt so usually try to add one or more into the works.  By doing so, I have made various types and styles of spiders, but I have to say, "This just might be my favorite."  I can't even tell you where I got the charm.  I have been known to buy 'odd' garments at a yard sale etc. just for the buttons.  About a week ago, I ended up with about a measuring cup full of single earrings, odd pieces of jewelry, and 'imperfect' miscellaneous pieces for a dollar.  I was thrilled.  The folks running the sale were kinda looking at me funny.  There was an older fella there, and he asked what I was going to do with them.  I told him I like to make crazy quilts so I like to have little treasures on hand.  He smiled and said, "Crazy quilts huh."  We didn't get to chat as others were needing his attention, but I am just guessing he had a story. 

Friday, I went to a downsizing/moving sale and found this beauty. 

Now hang on a minute.  Look closer.  I gave 50 cents and look what I got.  I wasn't after the polyester gabradine with the stain or even the fashion statement of the 1960's elderly population.  It was this.

It took a matter of minutes to remove them from the dress, and I now have these beauties to use on some fun project.

A couple of other goodies I found at the same sale:

This recipe book has a copyright of 1882 & includes instructions like, "use a piece of butter or over the eggs pour the lot."  I was having a blast reading it.  Our language has certainly changed over the years.

The point of all of this is that 'junking' has become quite fashionable within recent years, and we are eager to dig into what appears to be... well - junk.  Maybe, we should do that more often with people.  It might only take a moment to offer a kind word, and our treasure might not be tangible, but it will be priceless.  Think about your friends.  How many of them were introduced to you, and how many began simply as strangers then a smile and hello were made?  Please don't mistake me - People are not junk, but there are millions of them around & isn't it just amazing when we pick one and turn them into a friend?

Until Next Time - Even Stitches & Many Smiles

P.S.  I didn't mean to tease you with only the picture of the spider.  I will show you the rest of the quilt when it is finished:)